Richter Family-1383-1It’s really tough to deal with the lose of anyone, especially a close family member.  A fried lost a parent and being the child though of a father that is currently suffering with dementia, you are in a tough place. I’ve mentioned before how tough it is to deal with the issue of others grief when you are faced with a parent that is being tortured inside their own body.  It’s bad form to respond in a fashion of – I’d trade places.  You want to try to explain how you are so happy that at least their parent didn’t suffer for a long time being tortured inside their body with a mind that doesn’t quite work right and can’t control their own body.  How great it is that they went quickly as opposed to suffered in a position of not even knowing who you are, while you visit to make sure they are being treated well – all the while wondering if the care facility is just getting them out of bed for meals and that few minutes a week or day you come visit.

Personally I will miss my dad when he is gone, but I also already miss him while he is still here.  There are so many questions that I would love to ask him.  Yet the main part of my conversation comes down to Does anything hurt?  Do you recognize me? Do you want a Pepsi today?

So we remain silent and simply say sorry for your loss….  And I know jokes are told to help lessen the hurt, but probably not taken well…..  It’s just a way to make it through the day, because I do miss my dad, especially when I visit and talk to him.

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